The Family Trumps
Write about a character who holds a very strange artifact: a deck of cards that has faces instead of suits & numbers. What is the meaning behinds this deck? Where did this character obtain such a weird relic? And, above all, why is it that this character is willing to kill to keep it safe?
|Song: All The Puns|
|Artist: Cry, Russ, Red, Scott, Snake, Ziegs|
|Album: Late Night with Cry and Russ|
|Played: 9,524 times.|
All The Puns
|Song: Aleks' inside joke story|
|Played: 14,714 times.|
"Actually speaking of which, I have this inside joke with the school counsellor where I kept calling him Dad, and he’d call me Son."
all 46 excuses on my friends wall,
1. i was just really, really early for tomorrow
2. we can’t all be usain bolt
3. in this day and age, we shouldn’t need labels like “late”
4. i had pe first period do you blame me
5. i really, really didn’t want to sing
6. my brother thought it would be hilarious to drop me outside the prison gates
7. you can’t tell me how to live my life
9. my legs fell off and i had to roll all the way to the emergency clinic
10. there was a freak yachting accident
11. i am a fucking retard
12. this is just for my wall
13. do you even read these
14. “it does not matter how slow you go, so long as you do not stop”
15. i spent my entire night writing tom daley fanfiction
16. my father left my mother for an air hostess seven years ago do you expect me to get over that emotional trauma overnight
17. sarah palin and i got into a twitter war and i couldn’t leave and let her win
18. traffic jammy jammy jam
19. how can i go to school when alex turner
20. my sim was having an emotional meltdown and i needed to be there for her
21. i was sticking it to the man
22. i spent my entire night worrying if i would ever lose my virginity
23. fifty shades of late; i was walking and then i caught the eye of an attractive member of the opposite sex and we began exchanging significant looks and i knew we would one day make sweet love so i just walked alongside him and tried to catch his eye and to be continued
24. part two he was playing hard to get so we walked and walked and he had the perfect hair colour it was sort of beige brown anyway it turned out he was walking to a bus stop so obviously i had to catch the bus because true love and silently we rode out to papakura and into the sunset
25. my meth lab caught fire
26. my bed is more comfortable than your school will ever be
27. i was sad
28. it was a nice day, so i walked leisurely
29. i had beat my younger brother for saying “swag”
30. i had to travel back to the 1950’s to ensure my birth
31. 2 kool 4 scool
32. i had to stop, collaborate and listen
33. i tried
34. i’m sorry i’m late
it’s not my fault
my auntie was killed
and i joined a cult
35. a haiku about lateness:
late late late late late
late late late late late late late
late late late late late
36. my best friend was telling me how to give a satisfactory blow job i wish i was joking
37. i was fashionably late
38. i was caught in a flash mob true story omfg
39. i did not choose the late life, the late life chose me
45. i was fighting al qaeda
YESSSS IT’S ON MY DASHBOARD AGAIN
the post that doesn’t age
if lucifer needs someones consent to enter their body then so do you
Proof that tumblr is filled with psychopaths
(In the best way)
Welcome to the land of psychopaths and fandoms.
50 Shades of Grain
People on tumblr are the most creative people I’ve ever met
but do they come with a free toy inside if you know what i mean
yes but u have to order them by mail
But seriously if you don’t love Drake & Josh there’s something wrong with you, I mean
|Song: The Jared Padalecki Song|
|Played: 2,541 times.|
All the pretty girls all around the world are so in love with
All the little women,
They want to go swimming without their bathing suits on with
Cause Jared Padalecki is a handsome actor guy
And all the girls want to kiss him
Jared Padalecki is such a handsome actor man
And all the ladies want to kiss him on the lips
Jared Padalecki, what’s it like to be so wonderful?
I wish I was a tenth as wonderful as you are
Cause then I would be awesome
Instead of being the loser that I am
Oh, all of the women want to kiss Jared Padalecki
Because he’s handsome and he’s in movies and on TV
He’s a wonderful man
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah…
FRANKENSTEIN MUMMIES FOUND
An international team of archaeologists have discovered that two mummies found on an island off the coast of Scotland are, like Dr. Frankenstein’s monster, composed of body parts from several different humans.
For example, scientists realized a female skeleton’s jaw didn’t fit with the rest of the skull, and after some DNA testing, they found that the bones had come from different people. In the case of a male skeleton, the parts were from people who lived hundreds of years apart.
The reason for this is still unclear.
DAPHNE WHO THE FUCK U THINK U FOOLIN
fred finna tear it up in the basement
In Shenzhen, Guangdong, China, a sixteen-year-old boy was standing on a bridge, threatening to jump off and end his life. Hundreds of onlookers watched in horror as he refused to cross back onto the safe side of the guardrail. Police had arrived and were talking to the boy, but no one could get through to him.
Just then, Liu Wenxiu, a nineteen-year-old hotel waitress, was walking home from work when she saw the boy and knew that she had to do something to help him. Wenxiu had once been suicidal herself, so she knew how the boy felt. Telling police that she was his girlfriend, the girl managed to get close enough to talk to the boy. She shared her own sad and difficult life story, listened to his, and showed him the scar on her wrist from where she had tried to commit suicide herself.
“He said he’s hopeless, ‘so don’t waste your time to save me’. But I told him, ‘I’m not saving your life, I just want you to realize how silly you are being. Look at me, I’ve been there and I’m now here,’” Wenxiu said.
Finally, the girl was able to lean in and give him a hug, and then she unexpectedly gave him a kiss, as well. Police were then able to take the knife that the boy was holding and lead him back over to the safe side of the bridge.
I could not ignore this.
no one could
q’d (feel free to delete this) (◡‿◡✿)